Monday, January 14, 2013

But we couldn't sing The Jeffersons theme song since we live on the east side now...

Lately Indie Jake and I have been toying with the idea of buying a house. Up until recently I was dead set against the idea because I can't seem to go 5 minutes without running my maw on how badly I want to move back to Jersey. And seriously, I do. Like, a lot. Not to mention Charlotte schools probably couldn't teach kids to spell "Charlotte" or "schools" so I'm not so confident in the re-salability of a house. (You know, in case we can suddenly move to Jersey.)

But you know how I mentioned in the last post that TONS had happened in the last year? Well this is one of those things:
and I guess it really makes the idea of being financially reasonable seem like a better one. Holy cats, watch out. The next thing you know I'll be advocating a two drink maximum and getting up before 10 on weekends. No, no I won't. That's ridiculous.

So today on the way back from a 3 hour torture session grocery run, we decided to pop into an open house in a neighborhood we've been eyeing. It seemed a little too good to be true. Good enough even to coax us out of our little hipster paradise of a neighborhood, so we had to see what the real deal was.

Here, in short, is what I learned:

-There are houses in Charlotte that come wired with 3 prong outlets. You know, so you can plug in pretty much anything made after 1970. Who knew?

- Real estate agents look at you very strangely when you ask if you can use a hair dryer in the bathroom in this house. This strange expression turns to poorly masked fear when you explain that in your current rental you have to do so in the living room otherwise it blows the circuit on half your house.

-If you are ever peckish, apparently, it is good form to have free cookies at house showings.

-You shouldn't call it a "murder shed" out loud. People don't assume you see yourself as the victim.

-People do not assume one of the spare bedrooms is for the cat. They should, but they don't.

-We would have no idea what to do with a lawn that didn't do its own maintenance by turning into a lake every time it rains more than 1/4 of an inch.

-Anyone who doesn't evaluate a driveway based on the likelihood a car will get broadsided while parked in it has never been broadsided while parked in their driveway.

-"See you later!" is a really strange way to say goodbye to a real estate agent (especially after that awkward murder shed thing).

...lessons well learned I think. But not quite as important as knowing how to spell "schools". Frickin' resale value.


  1. Oh wowsers! Congrats lady! On the marriage and also on the possibility of buying a house. Scary but definitely awesome!

  2. When I was looking at houses, there was one place that had a "rec room basement!" that I am 90% sure was a killing room. Rec rooms have shag carpet and wood paneling, not soundproof doors and a drain in the floor.
    (Pause for awkward transition.)
    Congratulations on the marriage and good luck with your house hunting!

  3. nobody really thinks torture room basement until they see my basement.