Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Postage for the attention depr-ooh shiny thing...

Dear Company That Ships Us Our Fluff,

I am sometimes oblivious, but y'all completely read the schedule for the wrong day ALL DAY today. For this you shall be force to wear the village idiot hat all day tomorrow, while I mutter at you under my breath and do extra work. If this is repeated I will have your kidneys.

Sincerely,
Dani
_____________________________________

Dear Anyone Who Is Listening to Christmas Music Already,

STOP IT. The gun has officially been jumped. Chill out and make a hand turkey or something.

Sincerely,
Dani
_____________________________________

Dear Contractors Working on Daddy & Dahling's House,

Please, please, please stay on schedule. There might be a piece of Thanksgiving pie in it for you if you do.

Sincerely,
Dani
_____________________________________

Dear Rick from Pawn Stars,

It is pronounced "tin". "Ten" is the number between nine and eleven. You sound dumb. Say it with me. Tin.

Sincerely,
Dani
_____________________________________

Dear Anyone Who Has a Strongly Held Opinion on Whether or Not Four Loko Should Be Banned,

Seriously? You have got to find better things to care about.

Sincerely,
Dani
_____________________________________

Dear North Carolina Drivers,

Oh my dear sweet Jesus! The world will not end if you make a turn at more than 5 miles an hour. I promise.

Sincerely,
Dani





...now where did I leave my tiny postman?

1 comment:

  1. visitor of your website i will share it with my friends.Thanks.
    buy tudor watch

    ReplyDelete