Saturday, November 7, 2009

No that trash bag most assuredly was not empty when you turned around...

Q: What is the most frustrating thing you can do to a chick who is on a cleaning binge?

A: Make her clean out her deceased Grandmama's house.

Well, actually, that's not entirely true. The cleaning itself, not a problem...actually it was a glorious triumph. So much junk that I could just throw out! So much! So exciting!

The problem arose once it became painfully obvious that Dahling was going to make getting rid of anything a battle to the death (which is fairly ironic, considering that is how we got in the situation in the first place). I am all for the idea that one person's unneeded possessions can be donated to help others, but we only have 2 weeks to get the house entirely empty and I will be out of town next weekend so time and hands are limited.

So the game changed a little, to become "how much useless junk can i get in the garbage bag while Dahling is focused elsewhere?". I'm not going to say the answer is "A lot.", but the answer is "A lot".

And now, I present you with a partial (and i do mean partial) list of things that we uncovered that Dahling thought we might need to keep:

• 27 pairs of used knee highs (owned by a woman with chronic foot issues)
• Box of potatoes that expired before I graduated High School
• 1948 Almanac
• Hangers...oh God the hangers. (NO MORE WITE HANGERS!)
• Plastic Mufasa figurine out of a Happy Meal
• One high heel whose partner was no where to be found.
and my personal favorite...
• Stack of photos of folks that no one still alive can identify...we checked.(Cause really, isn't that like keeping the filler pictures that come with the frame?) thinks its time for a G. d. intervention.

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