Friday, August 21, 2009

At least she gives me an ally in the battle against arctic winter in the house...

Grandmama is not well.

She is more not well than usual. My grandmother and I have never had a Hallmark card, let’s go bake some cookies kind of relationship, but at the same time, we have become more understanding of each other over the last year.

The other day, she opened a drawer and, in doing so, somehow managed to fracture one of her lumbar vertebra. I know this should not be funny. She is my grandmother and she injured herself, but even she laughed at the sheer ridiculousness of that chain of events. 92 years of life under her belt and she was bested by a dish towel drawer.

My thoughts were, “Hey, she has a broken back…shouldn’t she maybe not be up and walking around?”, but I have been assured by Dahling, who in her own opinion knows all, and an EMT/future medical professional, that no, in fact, there is no need to sit still when you FRACTURE YOUR SPINE. Hrm…consider me corrected.

Grandmama has always been opposed to sailor words. When she first came to stay with us, I lent her my copy of Julie & Julia (you know, the amusing book that they have just made into a movie that I am, as of now, refusing to see since I liked the book and don’t want to sully my opinion of the story). When she finished, I asked her how she liked it and was told that, while she enjoyed the idea and the passages about Julia’s time in France, she did not care for the unnecessary foul language (which will teach her to borrow a book from her curse-happy granddaughter).

Wednesday morning I learned that apparently, when in pain, she will break this ban. While I was changing her Lidocaine patches and helping her get dressed, I learned Grandmama’s favorite sailor word…Cripes! If she said it once, she said it six times. I find this wholly adorable.

The hospice workers home health aids that are coming in to help care for her suggested that she get a hospital bed in her room. Apparently, that is a thing they can make happen, and voila!, 2 days later, there it was. That afternoon, a friend from her senior citizen gossip hour craft class called. Listening to Grandmama describe this bed was like listening to one of my computer geek aficionado friends describe a new water-based cooling system. Hospital beds are the hot gadgets with the geriatric set.

I see no more useful way to look at this than to see the humor. Perhaps that makes some people think I’m a terrible person. Tough.

…this concludes the moderately heartfelt portion of our program. Cripes!

1 comment:

  1. I don't think this makes you a terrible person at all. It sounds like you're looking on the bright side and took what could be a sad story and made it humorous and touching :)