Television commercials lately are really starting to worry me. I mean the most obvious offense is a Swiffer commercial that airs all the time where a woman is on the witness stand and is being questioned and at the end the prosecutor asks her to "point to the defendant" and she points to a broom in a chair and everyone gasps. Then the defense attorney objects. Hello! You want her to point to the offender... or the criminal.. or the one responsible... the defendant is pretty damn obvious... and being the defendant doesn't make you guilty. Also, idiot...you are the defense attorney therefore your client is, in fact, the defendant.
Then there is the commercial for Charmin where one bear vacuums the ass of the other bear because apparently the "other quilted toilet paper" leaves pieces. One: If you wipe hard enough to destroy your toilet paper, I feel bad for your nether regions. Two: NEVER, EVER SHOULD A VACUUM BE USED ON THE WAIST TO KNEE REGION OF ANYTHING LIVING!!! It's freaky and also dangerous! NO!
The third and most trippy commercial I shall complain about is for lord knows what. Certainly not I because I always get too flabbergasted at the beginning to pay attention to what it's for. A dog walks into a room, starts shaking, and shakes itself apart into several smaller dogs that spread out all over the room. WHAT THE HELL!? No, seriously. What kind of bad acid trip and Trainspotting induced haze does the ad exec need to be in to think that that is in anyway a fine idea for product promotion.
::Shakes her head::
Sometimes I worry....